Masturbation is healthy and normal—a way to explore what feels good for you. The most common areas to stimulate are the clitoris and vagina, but you can also explore anal play (always use lube for that). Try different techniques, speeds, and pressures, and don’t worry if you don’t orgasm from vaginal stimulation alone—most people don’t. You can also combine areas and touch other erogenous zones like nipples or ears. Getting in the mood can mean fantasizing, adjusting the lighting, putting on music, and always keeping lube handy.
Simply put, masturbation is fabulous. Beyond relieving stress (major), it’s a way to find out what gets you there. Learn all about it below.
What is masturbation?
Masturbation is essentially self-stimulation to achieve sexual pleasure and orgasm. It’s a healthy behavior that provides a personal and intimate exploration of one's body, desires, and preferences. Masturbation can involve self-pleasure of any of your erogenous zones, but the two most commonly aroused body parts are the clitoris and the vagina.
Clitoral masturbation
The clitoris has one job and it’s to get you off. Seriously. This complex network of tissues inside and outside of your body has 8,000 nerve endings designed to make you cum. The visible part of your clitoris is the glans and is generally covered by the clitoral hood. Stimulating this highly sensitive area leads to orgasm for most.
Tips for clitoral masturbation
- Step 1: Using your hand or a sex toy (like a vibrator), begin to stimulate your vaginal lips surrounding your clitoral hood.
- Step 2: From here, experiment with different techniques, speeds, and pressures. Follow the feelings, thoughts, and movements that feel right for you.
- Step 3: Focus on building your arousal gradually, with pressure and speed, until you achieve desired stimulation (which, more often than not, is an orgasm).
Vaginal masturbation
Vaginal masturbation involves stimulating the internal areas of the vagina with fingers or a sex toy to reach orgasm. One of the biggest myths about female pleasure is that people with a vagina can reach an orgasm through vaginal stimulation alone. While some people can, the majority do not. That doesn’t mean that vaginal stimulation needs to be ignored, but it’s important to remember that focus on the vagina alone might not do the trick. Vaginal stimulation can still feel pleasurable, especially as you touch your other erogenous zones.
Tips for vaginal masturbation
- Step 1: Massage the clitoris or the area surrounding the opening of your vagina. You can use lube or make yourself “wet” during the process.
- Step 2: Slowly insert your fingers or a sex toy and explore motions that feel good for you (in-and-out, circular, stroking, whatever you like). Pay attention to the erogenous zones in your vagina — you can find them by exploring different movement techniques.
- Step 3: As those good feelings continue to build, increase the speed and pressure until you achieve desired stimulation. Remember, if you don’t reach an orgasm through vaginal stimulation, it’s completely normal.
Anal masturbation
Yes, anal masturbation is a thing. This area can be very pleasurable, even if you don’t reach an orgasm. That said, you should take extra precautions when you masturbate in this area. The lack of naturally occurring lubrication and prevalence of bacteria make added lubrication an absolute requirement here.
Tips for anal masturbation (while protecting your body)
- Step 1: USE LUBE. This is a non-negotiable. Unlike your vagina, your anus doesn’t get wet. Put some lube on your fingers or a sex toy and begin to massage the exterior rim of your anus.
- Step 2: Slowly penetrate your anus and use different movements to increase your pleasure (in-and-out, circular motion, etc).
- Step 3: Just like your clitoris and vagina, continue to do what feels good or increase the speed and pressure until you achieve desired stimulation.
Combo or erogenous zone masturbation
Who says you can only masturbate in one area? You can stimulate any of these areas in combination to reach climax. Have fun with it and experiment to see what feels good.
Likewise, erogenous zones (nipples, ear lobes, the neck) are those other areas of the body that feel stimulating when played with. Touching, tugging, pinching, and caressing these areas add to your overall stimulation and sometimes lead to more intense orgasms.
How to get in the mood
- Fantasize. Let those fantasies come to the surface of your imagination, whether it’s from a book, film, pornography, show, real life, or fantasy. Your sexual desires are unique to you. Let your mind go wherever it wants.
- Explore those erogenous zones. Explore those sensitive and stimulating areas of your body that can increase your pleasure. Think thighs, nipples, ears, hips, and yes, even feet.
- Bump up the mood. Create a comfortable and relaxing environment for your masturbation adventure. Turn off the lights, light some candles, or put on your favorite music. Don’t forget, it’s all about you.
- Lube. Lube is your friend. As you become aroused, your body creates its own natural lubrication. Depending on what you’re doing (especially if it’s anal), you might need more. Keep a bottle on standby, just in case.
While we love to share useful and helpful information, the above shouldn’t replace the advice of your healthcare professional. For questions about birth control and other women’s health issues, please talk to your doctor.
Julie wants to keep young women in the driver’s seat of their own stories and provide them with the tools necessary for a happy, healthy sex life.
We know (and have lived!) through the ups and downs of young adulthood firsthand, and we aim to normalize the events, conversations, and questions that come during this period to help destigmatize sexual health. We believe women should live life with total freedom — starting with their ability to choose how, when, and if they become pregnant.
We know that women can make the best choices for themselves when equipped with the right information. We don’t take sexual education lightly and are committed to sharing accurate and factual information through rigorous planning and QA processes. In fact, all Julie content is reviewed by at least two board-certified doctors on our medical board. Learn more about them here.
For more details on our editorial process, see here.
Tessa Commers, MD, FAAP, MS is a board-certified pediatrician based in the Seattle area with a particular interest in adolescent health and sexual education. In addition to clinical practice and serving as Head of Medical at Julie, Tessa also founded AskDoctorT — an education platform with over a million followers across Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube — aimed at improving adolescent health literacy and body confidence. She also hosted and wrote the puberty podcast “That’s Totally Normal!” and has contributed to peer-reviewed publications and educational initiatives focused on child and adolescent wellbeing.
Education: Children’s Mercy Hospital, Kansas City – Pediatric Residency; University of Nebraska Medical Center – Doctor of Medicine (MD); University of Nebraska Medical Center – Master of Science (MS, Genetics, Cell Biology and Anatomy); New York University – Bachelor of Arts (BA)
